This May Be Angsty

A friend of mine...she's going through some things.  I've been there for her to help, albeit an undesired help at times.  But in my experience, it's when people don't want help that they need it the most.  So when I tried to help anyway, and it turned out that she really did just need some alone time and I may have been adding to what she was feeling.  Well, let me tell you I didn't feel very good :/

I've come to think of her as a little sister.  Or at least I tried too.  There was something there before, and we both acknowledged it but decided it was best not to peruse it.  And so we've both moved on.  Or so I thought.  I honestly hope she doesn't read this but I think there are still some unresolved feelings that she won't admit too.  I suspect this because it is the same for me.  I finally admitted that to myself today.

It's not that I want her to feel this way.  I hope she is over it.  But I suspect she isn't.  Nevertheless, even if she isn't over it, it's clearly not something that would make her happy as she is suppressing them so as not to have to think about it.

...and maybe it's best if she doesn't.  At least for now.  A part of me wants to figure this out with her.  "Yes I still feel that way but it's too hard, it will never work.  I will never stop feeling that way but it isn't good for either of us.

(I don't like the way I wrote any of that but that's how it came out.  I'm sorry.  I'm going attempt to sleep now.)

Your's In Writing

P.s.  Ironically, today was a really good day.